I can do hard things.

Challenge brings a choice.
I can lie down and believe the lies. I can give into insecurity. I can submit to sadness.
OR
I can look around and see the support I have. I can trust in God, and I can trust in myself.

I have faced challenge. It's hardly 8am and I've faced challenge today.

Yesterday, I was ready to give up the fight. Thank goodness I have someone (or two or four) that I could run to and they wouldn't let me down that easy. I am drained and I was looking for the easy way out. They reminded me of the strength I have. I am not proud of the actions I have made that stem from insecurity. I am learning big lessons here. Hard, hard, hard lessons.

I feel like everything I knew, everything that is safe, is leaving. I am going to terribly miss the mentor I have now. He is leaving the area, he is not leaving me. His love won't leave. He just is. His hugs will be few and far between, but his counsel and love will not vanish. He leads me closer to Christ, but I don't need him close to me to do that.

College is demanding and hard for me right now. I am overwhelmed, sad, stressed, alone, tired, unwilling, unmotivated, conflicted, struggling, unorganized, and unTerrin. I don't know who I'm supposed to be and what I'm supposed to be doing. I'm at the end of my frayed rope.

I had to look myself in the mirror yesterday and actually tell myself that I am strong. The one thing I believe I have is strength. I've been through strain and struggle and seen the other side. I had no choice then. I have choice now. And I choose to now use the strength I now know that I have. I won't let "tired" win. I won't let depression win. I won't let insecurity win. I won't let homework win. I won't let doubt win. I won't let my enemies win. I won't let the lies win.

I will prevail. My favorite professor told me this. "I can do hard things." I feebly whispered it yesterday. Today, I'm almost chanting.

I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things.

I am capable, you know why??? Reading 2 Corinthians 12:9 has never meant more. "But he [Jesus] said to me [Terrin], "My grace [the LOVE I have for you, that no, you don't deserve] is sufficient [rest. it's enough] for you [yes, even you], for my power [the victory of the resurrection!!!] is made perfect in weakness [You may be weak, but I never fail]." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses [Be open. Be vulnerable. Be transparent], so that Christ's power may rest on me [That points people to me and the saving power of the cross].

[I love you. Don't give up. The Enemy is whispering lies to you. He's leading you off as a slave to those lies. Don't let him win. Listen to me. I am the Truth. Don't give up. You can do hard things, because of what I've done for you. Yes, you are weak but look how strong I am. I did it for you.]


I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things.